Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize
