Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
