A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I just had sex on a roof
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
