If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Randomize
