Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
