I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
birth control should be required to get into college
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Randomize
