I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
this will be a night to untag.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
