my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
