just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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