She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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