im gay
i know
yea but for you.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
