Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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