I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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