I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
