Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
