i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
