I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Randomize
