belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize