Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
