so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I want to make a zoo with you.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
