yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Randomize
