He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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