I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
