Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Houston, we have a squirter
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
