Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
