I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Is Oprah even human
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
