I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
It was a blind-side dick pic.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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