At least make sure they are 18
Why
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
