Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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