someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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