Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Randomize