is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize