i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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