I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Randomize
