she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
