Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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