I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
