I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize