oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
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