Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Randomize