break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
