I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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