ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Randomize
