then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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