Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
