do herpes really smell.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Ladies don't puke and tell
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Randomize
