i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize