Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
