Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
We were destined to go to rehab together
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Dick very happy bro
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
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