It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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