Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
